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What is low self-esteem?

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• A debilitating condition inhibiting people from realizing their full potential.

• Can cause you to feel unworthy, incapable &incompetent

• Can be a difficult cycle to break free from as negative feelings about yourself perpetuate low self esteem. ​

 

Signs of low self-esteem: ​

• Negative view of life 

• Perfectionist attitude 

• Mistrusting others – even those who show signs of affection 

• Blaming behavior 

• Fear of taking risks 

• Feelings of being unloved and unlovable 

• Dependence – letting others make decisions 

• Fear of being ridiculed 

 

How can you raise low self-esteem? ​​​

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1. Start Small​

 

• Choose something you can do immediately & easily to gain confidence 

• Choose 1 task you can do today (e.g. clean your desk, organise some papers, pay a bill, go grocery shopping, do a meal plan for the week, go for a walk)

• Set a specific time for when you will complete the task

• Tick of the task when you have completed it

 

2.  Visualisation

 

• ​​Create an image of yourself as the confident, self assured person you want to be. 

• When you are this person, how will you feel? How will others perceive you? What does your body language look like? How will you talk?

• See these clearly in your mind’s eye, with your eyes closed. Feel the feelings, experience being and seeing things from that person’s perspective.

• Practice doing this for 10 minutes every morning.

• Put on music in the background that either relaxes you, or excites you.

• When you are done, write a description of this person and their qualities.

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3. Socialize

 

• ​​Get out of the house or setup a lunch/coffee date with a friend.

• Socializing builds connections & gives opportunity to practice your communication & interpersonal skills.

 

​​4. Do Something That Challenges You​​

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• Do something that challenges you/is beyond your comfort zone (e.g. going to a crowded place; introducing yourself to someone at a party)

• Practice & repetition will help to reduce your fear over time

• The more you are proactive in doing things that scare you, the less your fear will be, until it ceases to be a problem

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​​5. Do Something You Are Good At

 

• Reflect on ​​what you especially good at or enjoy doing

• Doing things that you are good at reinforces your belief in your abilities and strengths

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6. Set Goals 

 

• ​​Set goals that are clear, specific, measurable, achievable, realistic and time oriented. 

• Setting goals and taking action helps you to:

1. Build self esteem & confidence in your abilities to follow through

2. Allow you to see where you want to be

3. Feel like you are moving forward​

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7. Help Others Feel Good About Themselves

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• Help somebody or teach them something.

• When you help other people feel better about themselves and like themselves more, it will make you feel good about yourself.

• See what you can do to make others feel good or trigger them to smile.

• Try giving them a genuine compliment, helping them with something or telling them what you admire about them.

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8. Get Clarity on Life Areas

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• Get clarity on the life area that needs the most attention.

• Your self-esteem is the average of how you view yourself in all the major areas of your life.

• Write down all the major areas of your life, e.g., health, relationships, finance, etc. Then rate yourself on a scale of 1-10 in each area.

• Work on the lowest numbered category first, unless they are all even.

• Each area affects the other areas. The more you build up each area of your life, the higher your overall self-esteem.

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9. Create a Plan

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• Follow up goals with action

• Get clarity on your action items & create a plan

• Write down small steps to achieving your bigger goals so your goals seem manageable and you don’t become overwhelmed. 

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10. Get Motivated

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• Read something inspirational

• Listen to something empowering

• Talk to someone who can uplift your spirits and support you to become more of the person you want to be for yourself & your family.

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11. Stop Comparisons

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• Stop comparing yourself to other people.

• Try not to focus on what other people are doing. Accept that it’ll help you more to just go down your own path at your own pace rather than to compare yourself.

• Make today a chance to start afresh & begin immediately with the smallest step forward.

 

12. Look After your Body

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• Drugs or alcohol can affect your mood or how you feel about yourself. Seek help & support for these if they are an issues.

• Maintain a balanced diet & get regular exercise as looking after your body will also help you to feel better about yourself.